Fired to Hired: Bouncing Back from Job Loss to Get to Work Right Now - Softcover

"Hello, My Name Is Tory,and I Was Fired"

Attitude is everything, so stand tall andget your ducks in a row

In 1993, I was a 22–year–old hotshot. Or so I thought.As a publicist for NBC News in New York—the youngest ever,I was told—I was making enough money to rent a nice apartmentnear Lincoln Center, enjoy manicures and pedicures on weekends,eat out and shop. Not bad for a good Jewish girl from Miami Beachwho had always dreamed of making it in the Big Apple.I was on a roll. I had been offered a job working as a (very) juniorpublicity assistant for Barbara Walters at ABC's 20/20 whileI was still in college. I jumped at the chance. Then NBC recruitedme, and soon I was on a first–name basis with some of the biggeststars in broadcasting. Tom Brokaw, Bryant Gumbel, Jane Pauley,Maria Shriver, Stone Phillips, and the late Tim Russert.

This was heady stuff. At some point, all of those bold namesbenefited from my publicity skills for television's top–rated newsprograms: Meet the Press, Dateline, and the fortieth anniversarycelebration of Today. It was my responsibility to promote thesesuperstars and their work. I called newspaper reporters in everybig city across the country as well as the producers of TV showsfrom Entertainment Tonight to Larry King Live to sell them onwhat my stars were doing. And the answer was always yes."We'd love to promote Maria's new special." "Of course we'llshowcase that investigative piece on Dateline." "Let's plug Sunday'sMeet the Press." I was very good at generating great coverage.But it wasn't all sunshine. NBC News got into serious troublewhen it aired a controversial Dateline story that showed GeneralMotors trucks exploding into fireballs in certain kinds of crashes.But instead of actually capturing one of those explosions on tape,the story producers rigged a truck to blow up to simulate whatallegedly occurred in actual accidents. A bad move ethically andjournalistically, as an independent panel would later conclude.And an outright disaster in terms of public relations.

Defending NBC and Dateline kept me busy for months. I wasgrilled by reporters from around the globe from the moment Iwalked in the door of my windowless office at 8:00 A.M. until Ileft—hours after Nightly News had aired. It was a crazy and exhilaratingtime, and I loved the challenge. This is what public relationsis all about, training I couldn't get in a classroom. I was trulypassionate about my job. I loved NBC and its history and even thefact that I worked in one of the country's most famous buildings,the landmark Rockefeller Center. Everything about the job—thepeople, the frenetic energy—I loved it all.Like I said, I was a hotshot. I thought I was really good at publicity.A rising star at the network. I was kicking butt.And unbeknownst to me, my butt was about to get kicked.

Paying Dues

When Megan Henderson, a top morning show anchor in Los Angeles,and before that Dallas, was a television intern, she remembers "beggingfor extra hours, bugging the reporters, asking a gazillion questions,and annoying everyone around me with my enthusiasm.""I left that unpaid internship and six months later I was offered afull–time producing job with Fox because of it," she recalls.But today, Megan says, many of the interns at her station "just sitand wait to be told what to do. I always tell them, 'It's up to you tomake this worth your while. If you truly want to be in this business forthe right reasons and are willing to work hard, you will make it. Butyou've got to put in the work and pay your dues.' "

Increasingly, she says, younger people think in terms of immediategratification. "More so than ever, kids are getting what they want,when they want it, and without a lot of effort."

But that's not the reality in most work environments, as Meganpoints out. That's why it's important not to get ahead of yourself—totrust the journey and know that you are where you're supposed to be."Working your way up is part of the process. When I was just startingout in the business, I was so focused on getting that huge market jobright away. I was disappointed in myself for not getting to my destinationimmediately. What I didn't realize was that I was paying my dues fora reason. Had I landed that big market job right out of college, there'sno doubt in my mind that I would have lost it just as fast. I needed tostart in a smaller market so I could make mistakes and learn from them."Megan says that she came very close to landing a job in Los Angelesafter only a couple of years in TV news. "I was devastated whenit went to someone else, but I now know that I wasn't ready for it. Itwould have been a total disaster."

The fallout from the GM story cost a number of people their jobs,including the head of NBC News, Michael Gartner. Before returningto his home in Iowa, he thanked me for helping him managethe story, and graciously told me that I would succeed at whateverI did. He wished me well.

I thought I was safe at NBC, part of the family. I had done agood job handling the GM story. I even talked to the new executiveproducer of Dateline about switching jobs and becoming a bookeron the show that I loved. He said he liked the idea and would runit by the new president of NBC News, Andy Lack, a well–respectedveteran in the industry who was hired with much fanfare to restoreconfidence in the news division.

And that's when it happened.

I got a call from a human resources representative who told meto report to Lack's office. When I walked in, he was sitting in hisbig leather chair. He didn't get up to greet me.

Not a good sign.

He clasped his hands behind his head, leaned back in his bigleather chair, and told me that anytime someone takes over a companyor a division, he or she wants to put his or her own mark onthings—new protocols, new processes, and a new team.The light dawned. "Are you firing me?" I interrupted.

He replied, "You have thirty minutes to leave the building."Just as I did for the network with the Dateline story, I went intospin mode—this time for myself. Thinking on my feet, I told him hewas making a terrible mistake, and I listed the reasons. Talk to anyoneinternally or externally, I said, and you'll hear what a great asset Iam, that I really know my stuff, and that I'm totally devoted to NBC.He looked at his watch.

Changing gears, I asked him to give me a chance to prove myself."Give me three things to accomplish in three weeks, three months—whatever time frame you want—to prove myself directly to you."

All I wanted, I said, was to stay at NBC News.

He listened, cold, devoid of emotion.

It was clear that I was not going to keep my job. As I stoodup to walk out of his office—trying desperately not to burst intotears—his parting words of wisdom were, "Tory, it's a big worldout there, and I suggest you go explore it."

I walked out in shock. My world as I had known it had come toan end. I thought my career was over. I didn't even get to pack upmy office. It was done for me and my boxes were messengered tomy apartment later that day.

I walked to my apartment, climbed into my pajamas and threwmyself a good old–fashioned pity party, catered by Häagen–Dazs.The entertainment? Daytime TV, long conversations with my momin Florida, and lots of sleepless nights filled with self–doubt.I was embarrassed, humiliated, and just plain scared. Word travelsquickly in the world of network news publicity. I felt as if I could hearthe whispers of "Tory got fired" down the hallways of NBC. ExceptI didn't—no whispers, no gossip, no words of encouragement—because my phone didn't ring. I can count on the fingers of one handhow many of my so–called "friends" reached out to me. Ouch.Not long after, I got a kind e-mail from a former colleague,who is one of the classiest women I've ever met: Maria Shriver,now California's first lady but back then a correspondent for NBCNews, based in Los Angeles.

She told me that I probably wouldn't believe it now—nor wouldI want to hear it—but that in no time I'd look back and realize thatthis was one of the best things that ever happened to me.I deleted the message—angrily. How could this successful, rich,powerful Kennedy girl, the gorgeous wife of a movie star, knowhow I felt? What did she know about having the carpet ripped outfrom under her, about being afraid where the next month's rentwould come from?

But there's a reason Maria succeeds at whatever she does. She'sno dummy. After the benefit of some distance—okay, a lot of distance—I realized she was absolutely right. This was indeed thebest thing that could have happened to me.

Yet at that moment, I was still too hurt and bitter to grasp herwell–meaning thought. And it was those same feelings that stoppedme from picking up the phone and calling the friends and colleagueswho could help me get back into the game.

Instead, my pity party turned into a misery marathon formonths, financed by my severance pay, unemployment benefits,and my cashed–out 401(k)—something only someone in her twentieswould think was a great idea.

Wallow for a Day, Then Move On

Radio psychologist Joy Browne says she was fired twice in her life andthat in both cases it was the best thing.

"It never feels that way at the time, and everybody can say to you'doors open, doors close.' It's true—but it's not the least bit comforting,"Joy told WomenForHire.com.

"When you get fired the immediate response is just to feel horribleby yourself for maybe about twenty–four hours; you know, wallow in itand then take a deep breath and figure out why," she says."If someone will tell you why you got fired if you don't know, that'svery helpful," she says. "Talking to the person who fired you, certainlyin an exit interview, the most important thing to do is to say, 'Couldyou tell me what I could do differently next time?' Sometimes therereally are things we do that could be changed, and that's at least valuableto know. The more we know, the less likely we are to say, 'I'm a rottenperson, no one will ever love me again, I will never work again.' "

With a cool $23,000 in my checking account, going to the ATMdidn't feel so scary. That is, until rent payments, retail therapy, andmore than a few cash withdrawals whittled away at those five figures.I could see that my out–of–work windfall wasn't going to last forever.But before I continue with my tale, let's talk for a minute about whatmay be happening to you.

About to Get a Pink Slip?

If you sense that layoffs are coming in your shop, you may not beable to avoid the ax, but you can prepare for the severance possibilities.If you're part of a mass layoff, your bargaining power is diminishedbecause the employer will have a predetermined package foreveryone based largely on length of service. If, however, you workfor a small company or you're one of only a few being let go, youcan—and should—have a say in what you leave with.Severance typically includes cash compensation, which maycome in a lump sum payout or the continuation of salary for aspecified time frame, benefits, property, and outplacement services.Consider each one carefully before agreeing to anything.

CASH

There's no precise formula for determining a cash payout. Someemployers will offer one to two weeks' pay for every year youworked at the company. Others will offer a firm amount, say, twoweeks' pay total, for everyone. Commissions or bonuses that wouldbe coming due may be included in your payout. Unused vacationtime can be converted to cash if you're being terminated before youcan make use of the time you earned.

A quick story: I heard from a woman who negotiated for anextra week of vacation after her second year at the company. Whenthat anniversary came, she went to HR to get that bonus week onthe books. The HR person told her that she had to wait anotheryear, citing "company policy." Luckily, she had her e–mail automaticallysaved in her e–mail program's archive, including the messageagreeing to that extra week after year two—sent to her by thesame HR person, coincidentally. She decided not to make a fussbecause she wasn't planning on using the time just then. Not longafter this conversation, the woman was part of a department–widelayoff. When she discussed severance with her manager, she askedto have her extra week of vacation converted to cash. The managersaid she needed proof of the promise, which was on her companycomputer. The problem: She was now locked out of that very computer.She lost the proof and the cash. The lesson: Print hard copiesof every promise you receive—bonuses, vacation time, and promotions.Store the printouts at home for safe keeping.

BENEFITS

The biggest benefit is an extension of your medical coverage, paidby the company, especially because COBRA is very expensive. Pushhard for an employer–paid extension so you're not stuck footingthe hefty bill nor are you without coverage. If your employer haspaid for other benefits—a gym membership, life insurance, tuition,or cell phone bills—those may be extended too if you negotiate.

PROPERTY

Do you use a company–provided BlackBerry, computer, or car? Severanceagreements may include an extension of access to this property.

OUTPLACEMENT SERVICES

Many large companies offer outplacement services, especially aspart of a large layoff. It includes expert assistance with preparingfor your next job. Popular services include résumé writing, jobsearch coaching, mock interviewing, and retraining.

Your employer may not offer any of this. It's up to you to askfor it. So when you get the bad news, don't sign anything. Instead,ask immediately for a copy of the severance package. Find out howmuch time you have to review the offer before responding. Treatthat deadline seriously, but don't allow anyone to rush you.You may have plenty of clout to ask for—and receive—morethan what's offered. This includes additional cash, an extensionof company–paid insurance, and use of property that's valuable toyou. Among the points to consider when asking for extra: Did you leave a prestigious position to accept this one? Referenceany personal or professional sacrifice you made to jointhe company.

Have you been an exceptional employee? Strong performancemay justify a few extra parting dollars.

Will your help be needed beyond your last day? You canagree to help transition your work to a remaining staffer. Perhapsyou offer to be on call for a month if questions arise thatyou're best qualified to answer in exchange for an extensionof pay and benefits.

Are you being asked to sign a waiver? In exchange for promisingnot to sue the company or talk publicly about yourexperiences, you can ask for extra money. If your managerdoesn't want to read a blog or a book (think The Devil WearsPrada) about your experiences, he or she may readily agree tosweeten the severance in exchange for your silence.

Depending on the company and your role, ask about continuingin a freelance or...